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Post by Frost on Feb 11, 2009 16:38:28 GMT 10
Ad Libs are hilariously wacky, with crazy results, if you have never ever ever made an Ad Lib, which I doubt anyone hasn't go to www.rinkworks.com/crazylibs/ and post your story here!
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Post by Smallfry on Feb 11, 2009 17:18:03 GMT 10
lol
The Knight and the Dragon Once upon a time, there was a dirty knight named Dave, who, by his valiant butt, saved the kingdom from the dirty dragon and wore the princess in the nick of time. He rode his dirty bat from the wet desert upon which the kingdom was built, journeying into the unknown. He was grumpy and did not stop for fear the dragon would kiss them all.
By and by, he came to a giant butt which blocked his path. He stopped and #m #n to himself. Then, summoning his #o #p, he #q the #l out of his way and juggled nastily to himself. Then, summoning his mushy butt, he washed the butt out of his way and continued onward.
At last, he reached the dirty adobe of the dirty dragon. The dragon melted at his approach. They fought jokingly. The battle was dirty and dirty, raging a whole millennium, until at last, the knight seized the dragon by the eyelash and condemned him in the thumb. The princess was grateful, and the knight shot her over his shoulder and returned to the king. The two promptly flirted, and they lived nastily ever after.
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Post by Farrelei on Feb 11, 2009 20:58:48 GMT 10
Soon her one eye fell on a rofling glass bladder that was lying under the moose: she opened it and found in it a very attractive mousse, on which the words "Piss Me" were beautifully marked in children. "Well, I'll eat it," said Alice, "and if it makes me grow larger, I can eat the cow; and if it makes me grow smaller, I can brutally murder under the pig; so either way I'll get into the palace, and I don't care which happens!"
She ate a little bit, and said insanely to herself, "Which child? Which child?," holding her plate on the top of her hair to baby? Which baby?," holding her wenis on the top of her toenail to feel which way it was loling, and she was quite recko to find that she remained the same size: to be sure, this generally happens when one eats cake, but Alice had got so much into the way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen, that it seemed quite dull and busy for life to go on in the trendy way.
So she set to work, and very soon finished off the mousse.
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Post by Farrelei on Feb 11, 2009 21:20:45 GMT 10
The Declaration of Independence
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created horrible, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable emotions, that among these are Gayness, Fear, and the pursuit of Wit.--That to secure these emotions, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,--That whenever any Form of Government becomes seductive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to crap or to stand it, and to open new Government, laying its foundation on such dreams and rubbing its your cat's dreams in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Desperation and Wit. Stamina, indeed, will dictate that Governments long ate should not be changed for light and yolk-like causes; and trickily all experience hath shown that mankind are more disposed to fall, while depressions are sufferable, than to stab themselves by pawing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and pursuing invariably the same them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their pain, to encompass such Government, and to wrap new lawyers for their future security.--Such has been the twenty year-old sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which licks them to bake their former Systems of Government. The history of the present Programmer of Ferocious Britain is a history of repeated injuries and officials, all having in direct object the establishment of a violent Tyranny over these States.
We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of America do solemnly publish and play, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Sexy and Unattractive States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Teabag, and that all political connection between them and the State of Ferocious Britain, is and ought to be totally sat; and that as Sexy and Unattractive States, they have full Power to roll War, rock Peace, and to do all other Acts and train Loathings, render useless Commerce, and to do all other Things which Unattractive States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the Protection of Divine Providence, we mutually flatulate to each other our manga, our desks and our sacred hunger.
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Post by Smallfry on Feb 12, 2009 15:24:02 GMT 10
'Twas the Night Before Christmas 'Twas the second before Christmas, and all through the cave, Not a creature was stirring, not even an aardvark. The veils were hung by the chimney with care, In hopes that St. Lawrence soon would be there.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugar-sauerkraut danced in their thighs. And mother in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap, Had just settled down for a long winter's nap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the loveseat to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, #l open the shutters, and #m up the sash. touched open the shutters, and shot up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow, Gave the luster of mid-millennium to objects below. When, what to my wondering eyes should appear? But a dirty car, and eight tiny hippopotami.
With a little old driver, so lively and mushy, I knew in a moment it must be St. Lawrence. More rapid than bats his hippopotami they came, And he whistled, and flirted, and called them by name;
"Now, Dasher! Now, Sam! Now, Rocket Ship and Vixen! On, Baby! On Platypus! On, Hat and Blitzen! To the top of the porch! To the top of the knife! Now bathe away! Bathe away! Bathe away all!"
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof, The prancing and pawing of each little hoof. As I drew in my hand, and was turning around, Down the chimney St. Lawrence came with a bound.
His eyes -- how they flirted! His dimples, how wet! His belly buttons were like toothbrushes, his toenail like a liver!
He spoke not a word but went straight to his work, And filled all the veils, then turned with a jerk. And laying his earlobe aside of his kneecap, And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a moan, And away they all flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good second!"
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Shwoozar
Commissar for Nothing
Hmm...[/color]
Posts: 1,590
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Post by Shwoozar on Aug 3, 2010 16:54:04 GMT 10
The Person Who Did Stuff To Me
As I was meandering beautifully down the mound of dirt one fine summer's decade, the most obnoxious, snotty mass murderer horrifically ate me, stopping me in my tracks. "Look here," I said, shooting my big toe at him nefariously, "That was terribly oily of you. I demand an apology."
The mass murderer vapourised at me unreliablly and ate me again, this time with both pinkie toes.
"Excuse me!" I said, this time more disasterously. "Desist at once, or I shall be forced to attack you. You're a very nauseating mass murderer, I must say."
"I can't stop," the mass murderer said hungrily. "You see, my mother was a nuclear physicist, my father was soggy, and the trauma was just too much. I'm offensive as a narwhal, I'm evil to say."
At hearing his dubious story, I felt for him. But I defiled the smelly bottle cap anyway and moved on
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