Just beacuase

[Shwoozar]

Stephen remained silent throughout the meeting, trying to get comfortable in the seat. He could not, when he recieved his file, he read it in depth, trying to distract himself from the pain radiating from his backside.
The name he read from the sheets again after reading them 'Shane Dawson'.
Stephen concentrated, he was sure he knew the name but not where he knew it from. He gave up with a thought along the lines of; if it was not in the IT for dummies course, its not important.

Once the meeting was over, Stephen stood with some relief, only to find that standing hurt just as much. @%$#. Stephen re-read the name of is co-worker for this mission, 'John'.
Stephen decided to read peoples nametags. Unfortunately, only one person was wearing a nametag, fortunately, it said 'John', Unfortunately, the person wearing the nametag was Phillip, fortunately, Stephen didnt care.
'Hello Phillip' Stephen had no qualms about this guess. This person was definately Phillip.
'My name, is John. Why are you talking to me?' Questioned Phillip/John, raising his head to look Stephen straight in the eye.
'My Papers say that I am teamed up with you' Replied Stephen, showing him the paper.
At that moment, he heard someone say 'tits'
Stephen spun around searching in vain.
'Where?' He asked
Stephen was ignored, so he turned back to a frown" I am "John Newman"'
Stephen blinked.
'Well sorry for disturbing you Phillip'
Phillip/Johhn Glared at him and Marched out of the room.
Stephen then realised that there was only three otheres left, so he left the room and went down to the lobby where he had seen a nice sofa to sit on whilst he waited for his mother.971

[Milk]

"There's no way I'm going in there."
"Yes you are m'boy, and you will enjoy it!"
"No, Mum please. You know I'm not good at this kind of thing."
"Listen here boy. I didn't raise you to be like yo white arse father."
"Don't bring him into this."
"Listen, you going to this, I don't have many friend and you have.. Well, none."
"What if he makes noises while he eats. I can't stand that."
"Get out of da damn car Marvin, you going in. He works with you, so ya may as well get ta know each udda."
"Please Mum."

Marvin's mother pulled him out of the car and dragged him to the front door.
"Don't you dare do anything stupid, This lady is very nice and invited us here. " She said as she knocked on the door.

[Biomanic]

"BRIAN! Can you get the door, sweety" Shouted Mrs. O'Reily from the kitchen. Brian sighed and got up out'f his wank-chair and waddled upstairs. He peared through the doors peep hole, and noticed that Marvin's mother was black, and Marvin was white.

"Mum, you never told me Mrs. Marvin was black" Shouted Brian, still standing next to the door. Mrs. O'Reily ran to the door, and opened it, trying to pretend her son didn't just say that. Marvins mother was starting stone faced as Nicole began to appologise profusely.

AN HOUR LATER

Nicole and Mrs. Soup Chomper were still sitting at the dinner table, as Brian and Melvin sat down in the living room, awkwardly staring at each other.
"You're fat" said Marvin.
"You're fatter, bitch" snapped Brian.
"I bet you play Nightelf" Laughed Marvin, making a wanking motion.
"Fuck off, dickhead, your mum is black"
"Don't say my mum is black!"
"YOUR MUM IS BLACK!"

The two stood up, which in itself took a few moments and attempts.
"You wanna try this?" Asked Melvin
"Run at me"

And so they wrestled. Wrestled for minutes until both their parents came rushing in.
"WAT DA FUCK R U NIGGERS DOIN, MOTHERFUCKERS?S?!" Exclaimed Mrs. Soup-Chomper.
"Yes, Brian. What are you doing to that poor boy? Get up now" Said Nicole.

The two had to be pulled apart, as both sweated so much that they infused together.

[Shwoozar]

Stephen was beginning to feel rejected, all the other boys mothers had come, but his had not. Stephen began to cry.

[Silverlining]

John "Johnny Zilch-Balls" Smiddly "Fiddle-Balls" Fiddlesworth
Gregory Smith Daniels Perdomo Jack Gregory Touchstone McGannis sighed, and stepped across the floor, towards the other boy. He stopped, his shoes blindingly bright, and coughed.
A bird flying out-side heard the sound, and died from the supremely high frequency sound-waves, falling to the floor. The noise continued, passing through bird after bird, causing them to fall in many great numbers. Later on, the cause of death could be un-certified, but that's... Another story.

After the inaudible throat-clearing, he pulled out a note-pad, drew his pen from his pocket, spinning it, before clicking, his pen flying across the paper, as he wrote...

Hi. My name is J.McGannis. Who the fuck are you?"

He looked over the notes he had carried out from the meeting, and continued.

Are you the one that they refer to as Stephen?
Why aren't you a hot chick? (At this point, a tear stains the page.
WHYYYY!
OH GOD, WHY! WHY DO I HAVE TO BE WITH A MAN! WHY DO YOU CURSE ME TO THIS FATE!"

His pen broke in his hands, spraying ink everywhere, and completely covering the notepad before he could show it to the other man.

"... Fuck..." he whispered.

The pillars of the government building shook, as the shockwave of high-frequency sent him turning head over heels, landing against a wall on his head.

[Shwoozar]

Stephen was scared. He was unsure who this person was, or why they had approached him.
Stephen did some quck thinking. He worked for the government. People dont like the government.

Stephen charged the strange man, his body fat orbiting his body as the rebounding pressure waves decided to screw the laws of reflection at get him instead. Stephen started hitting the strange man with his sheet of paper, giving the man numerous papercuts in the process.
"Who are you and what do you want?" he demanded
A rather supprised desk/secutary - woman/employee looked at him strange.
Stephen waved his paper threateningly.

[Silverlining]

John Jonathan "Johnny Zilch-Balls" Smiddly "Pissy-pants" McDoogle "Fiddle-Balls" Fiddlesworth Gregory Smith Daniels Perdomo Jack Gregory Gregory Touchstone McGannis nearly screamed, but managed to hold it in, as numerous papercuts flooded across his skin. His blood dripped down, and he found himself unable to say anything. He silently sighed, careful not to make a sound, as he wrote down his name, and the fact that he was most likely the odd man's partner.

Yes. He had finally posted.

[Shwoozar]

((I had such a long post typed out, and then the page re-loaded.))
Stephen seemed to come out of a trance.
He shivered, blinked, and read the proffered paper.
He read it again.
'I am Stephen, and I dont know why.'
The woman behind the desk continued to stare at them.
At that moment, the doors creaked, and in came Stephen's mother.
'Mother!'
Stephen stubled before hurrying over to his mother.
'It is my intention to see you tomorrow as we commence working together' Stephen called as he hurried with his mother out the door.